We NEED the rest of the story!

As the newspaper wanted it to, the following headline caught my eye:

Washington man with dead weasel accused of assault.

Except, it wasn't a weasel...it was marten.  Still, the only thing that would have made it better is if the dead member of the Mustelidae family was actually used to make the assault, instead of just as a tool of distraction. 

Before people start attacking how strange Seattle is(and really, I have no cause to defend Seattle) Hoquiam is not close to Seattle...probably around a 3 hour drive to the coast....it a little logging/shipping town out past Aberdeen.  It's also not the kind of place where a story like this is entirely out of place.

 I didn't even know we HAD marten's in Washington.  I have seen two of what I thought were badgers before...they looked to big to be either weasels OR martens.  

I'm just waiting for the rest of the story...what we know so far, like the astronaut driving 900 miles wearing Depends...is almost too good to be true.